By MERVIN BLOCK
February 2003

We’re being two-timed, and I’m not going to take it any more. At least, not until I finish this beef. Here’s my problem, really our problem:

The most elastic words in our language are taffy and Slinky®. No problem there. But in some broadcast newsrooms, the most elastic words are today and tonight. And they are stretched and twisted daily. For many listeners, it’s irritating. Makes us wonder whether fresh scripts are fed into a time machine that rejiggers the time elements, digitally advancing the time: yesterday news is todayed. And today news is tonighted—at the speed of dark.

Let’s look at a story where time was stood on its head--and listeners were misled:

On Monday, Jan. 20, at 2:30 a.m., Greenwich Mean Time, The Associated Press moved a story from London about a police raid on a mosque there. The British news agency Press Association reported that the raid had started at 2 a.m., GMT, which is five hours ahead of Eastern Time in the United States. That means the AP story reached newsrooms in this country at 9:30 p.m., ET, Sunday. In New York City, I heard it on the late news Sunday.

The next day, I did a double take when I heard a newscaster speak of today’s raid. And I wanted to find out whether other newscasters were tampering with the time. They were.

About 4:30 a.m., ET, Monday, an anchor of ABC’s “World News Now” said the raid took place “this morning” and introduced a correspondent in London. He reported, “It was 2 a.m. this morning when British anti-terrorist police….” (Yes, 2 a.m. this morning is redundant, but he was right about the time where he was.)

Wherever we are, we operate by the time in that place. If I board a plane in Chicago for an 8 p.m. London flight, in London it’s already tomorrow. Once I’m settled in my seat at 7:45 p.m., would I use a phone to tell someone, “I’m leaving for London tomorrow”? Not unless I’ve gone haywire.

How did other national newscasts present—or misrepresent—the time of the raid? Here are snippets from several ‘casts, not necessarily their newsrooms’ first accounts:

NBC’s “Today” said, “Police in London raided a mosque this morning....”

CBS’s “Early Show” reported an “early morning raid,” but didn’t say today.

CNN said, about 10 a.m., “Police in Britain have raided a mosque this morning.” With the present perfect tense—have raided—we don’t use a time element. And certainly not one that’s wrong. If anyone in the States had consulted a clock, a calendar and his conscience, he’d have acknowledged that the raid was made the previous night. Sure, last night and yesterday are dirty words in a lead, but that’s why God created the present perfect tense. The next day, Jan. 21, CNN.com posted an article datelined London, saying, correctly, the raid had taken place Monday around 2 a.m., GMT.

About 3 p.m., Monday, NPR said, “Police raided a London mosque today.”

ABC’s “World News Tonight” said, “Before dawn in London today, police raided a mosque….” Then the anchor said to a Washington correspondent, “I take it the discovery [discovery?] of the raid of this temple [temple? temple?] was no surprise.” The correspondent’s first words were “It was really no surprise.” YDTICMTU, DY? (That’s shorthand for “You don’t think I could make that up, do you?) No surprise? If not, why make so much of it? I don’t know about you, but the raid did surprise me. So did the way that newscast knocked its story down.

CBS’s “Evening News” said, “Also in London today, police raided a mosque and arrested seven men.”

NBC’s “Nightly News” said, “Now to London, where a controversial mosque was the target today of the war on terror.”

Also at 6:30 p.m., the Fox News Channel said, “Police in London used battering rams and ladders to raid a mosque this morning….”

A half hour later, MSNBC said, “Police in London making seven arrests in a raid at a mosque….” But anchor not speaking English. Sounding as if police making arrests at that very moment even as he misspeaking. Who talking that way?

At 10 p.m., in Toronto, CBC-TV’s “The National” said, “In London today, officers from Scotland Yard used battering rams to raid a mosque….”

FYI, Monday’s Los Angeles Times ran 197 words about the raid. The next day’s New York Times ran 1,037 words. And the Washington Post ran 803 words.

Just as easily as some scripts convert yesterday into today, they turn today into tonight. On Jan. 8, a Turkish Airlines plane crashed in Turkey about 2 p.m., ET. Yet the CBS “Evening News” said, “The British-made Turkish Airlines jet went down as it tried to land tonight….”

Shifting time ahead may make the news sound newsier. But for smart listeners, it can make the whole newscast sound shifty. As the legal maxim puts it, Falsus in uno, falsus in omnibus: False in one thing, false in everything. So when a witness in court is caught lying, all his testimony becomes suspect. And that’s the way it is, in courtrooms and in newsrooms.